Indeed, Brown’s glossy version of womanhood - slender, straight, cisgender, white, and upwardly mobile - has always had its others: queer women, women of color, disabled women, poor women, and anyone who didn’t hew to the Cosmo girl archetype that dominated the late 20th century. Notably, the book scarcely acknowledges queer desire, mostly depicting gay men as a pitfall in straight women’s search for love. Her sparkly prose was devoured by an audience who craved something other than domesticity.īut of course, Sex and the Single Girl - and Brown’s revamped, sexed-up Cosmopolitan magazine - didn’t speak to everyone. In 1962, when Helen Gurley Brown published her bestselling advice book, women couldn’t open credit cards in their own name, and Cosmopolitan magazine - which Brown would soon oversee as editor-in-chief - was still running anodyne cover stories like “How to Protect Your Family.” Against this cultural backdrop, Brown urged young women to enter the workforce and sleep with men. However, for many this stereotype is frustrating as it forces them to straddle two worlds: they can be either romantic or sexual, but not both.In many ways, Sex and the Single Girl was groundbreaking. While it’s important to note that promiscuity is not necessarily a bad thing: many people (of all sexualities) enjoy transient romantic and sexual encounters over monogamy. Of course, grown men kissing each other is nothing new: but we should be hesitant in promoting a hyper-sexualised image where gay and bi men are seen to engage in sexual activity that bolsters the stereotype that they are fleeting, or shallow. While all dating shows rely on initial couplings, the immediate kisses that give this new format its working title provide an unexpected twist, but perhaps also a sign of things to come. Today, the prevalence of apps such as Grindr among the LGBTQ+ community continues to reinforce the idea that gay and bi men are all promiscuous: interested in sex rather than romance. Presenting diversity onscreen isn’t just about changing hearts and minds by normalising queer experiences, it’s also a chance to show the LGBTQ+ community as it is This damaging dichotomy has roots in the AIDS crisis, where gay and bi men were scapegoated for the spread of the deadly virus and were viewed by society as promiscuous sexual deviants. Historically, the representation of gay and bi men in media has been either as entirely sanitised and sex-free or seedy, sleazy and sex-obsessed. Of course, a muscly man is easy on the eye – but wouldn’t it be even better to see him fall in love with a shy trans man, or at least someone who’s familiar with a chocolate digestive? In an ideal scenario, their looks wouldn’t matter at all. While there is the danger that I Kissed A Boy will fall into the same trap as other dating shows, it would be exciting for the show to feature a more diverse mix of body types.
Either they strive to achieve these unattainable body types or risk ending up alone.Ī recent survey revealed that 84% of gay and bi men feel intense pressure to have a ‘good body’, with 18% of gay boys and 13% of bisexual boys experiencing eating disorders (in comparison to just 3% of their heterosexual counterparts). Muscly men are not only present in dating shows: they seep into gay culture through all media, with their desirability often defining the self-worth of gay and bi men.
Such a lack of body diversity disproportionately affects members of the LGBTQ+ community, with recent studies finding that 56% of gay and bi men feel anxious or depressed because of their body image (compared with 33% of those that identify as heterosexual). The freshly-waxed men all flaunt their bulging biceps and washboard abs to the cameras – presenting a very specific image of masculinity deemed to be the most attractive to audiences at home. Similar shows such as Love Island have come under fire in recent years due to the lack of body diversity on display.
However, there’s a sense of trepidation alongside the excitement: the show runs the very real risk of reinforcing damaging stereotypes of body image, hyper-sexuality and promiscuity. Ð Who loves LOVE? If you are ready for LOVE, come join me, & for âI Kissed A Boyâ ð (working title) a dating show that will follow 10 single gay men looking for LOVE.